A Year In The Garden: Incredible Beauty, Explosive Sex & Violent Death in One Suburban Backyard

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You learn to identify the cues of strangers responding to your visible difference — refusal to make eye contact, edging away should they be forced to stand near you in line, tight-lipped grimaces when you smile at their baby. Mehra and her spouse live much like heterosexual married parents do, balancing work and home life, getting dinner on the table, paying bills and caring for their child. Mehra and her spouse come from different cultures and backgrounds and have both had to grapple with coming out to a world that can often be harsh for members of the LGBTQ community.

Together, they are raising an African-American child, who speaks Hindi with his Indian-born grandmother, and at times, wears a tutu. Race, sexuality and gender are at the crossroads of their home. Yet, they want what families of all descriptions want. They want to love the life partner they chose, continue building a life together and raise a happy, healthy child. Through knowledge of the experiences of Mehra and her family, increased acceptance of others will be cultivated.

Then, maybe we all can be comfortable. He dug the young trees up from the big woods on the backside of the farm and lined them up along the road with two on one side of the driveway and one on the other. So begins the lives of three young water oaks and a family. Under the sheltering limbs of oaks, pecans and pine trees in north Mississippi, Graves grew, learned and explored. His is a love story, first of his parents, then of his own true love, and of the love he and wife Deanie have for their own children.

Forest Service. Indeed, our lives would be poor without the green spaces and sheltering branches in our world. Can there ever be enough of them? One does not have to be a naturalist, as Graves most certainly is, to appreciate his vivid descriptions of trees, nature and its seasons. One only needs to be a lover of the written word. The lush descriptions and poignant memories are enough to draw the reader through, story by story, but then there are, planted throughout the coffee-table book, photos of trees by Graves and others. Rough and rugged bark, outstretched boughs and the delicate lace of branches, twigs and leaves, all are shown in rich detail.

I plan to enjoy this second volume as I did the first, in my back yard, reading in the shade of a maple tree. This story had a little bit of everything: humor, romance and definitely suspense. There were a few places that actually were just a tad scary and I would find myself holding my breath as I was reading. Sarah Booth and Tinkie have been hired to represent archaeologist Dr. Frank Hafner, who has been arrested for murdering his colleague.

They had been working on an archaeology dig together on a burial mound, Mount Salla in Sunflower County. There have been some strange things happening around the dig and where the ritual murder happened. Sheriff Coleman , who is romantically involved with Sarah Booth, is ready to solve the case.

I was really excited to see Sarah Booth and Coleman get together after all these years. Jitty also adds a little comic relief to the story which is a nice break from the mystery. Mississippi has several Indian mounds around our state and it was great that Haines included some of the history in the story. The book moved really quickly and it keeps you guessing about the identity of the murderer to the very end.

Carolyn Haines is a native Mississippian from Lucedale. She now resides in Alabama where she lives on a farm with cats, dogs and horses. She writes about her love for animals in her stories. Her dog Sweetie Pie is a favorite of mine.

Book Reviews

Set in against the backdrop of the construction of the Industrial Canal, the novel follows the tragic paths of three interconnected antiheroes: detective William Bastrop, musician Isadore Zeno, and Mafia mama Beatrice Vizzini. Although he is excellent at helping the reader understand why his flawed characters make bad decisions, he is less successful at creating authenticity. Despite the complex story, the novel is easy to read, and although it never coalesces into a compelling narrative, Rich, a magazine writer with a pedigreed literary family his brother was the youngest writer for Saturday Night Live , his father a columnist for the New York Times , and his mother an editor at HarperCollins , knows his way around a metaphor and often gifts the reader with beautiful sentences.

There are towns within towns. There are rivers that run down and run back up too. There are also books within books, but King Zeno does not contain such multitudes. It is written like his magazine articles and works of nonfiction—as a deeply curious outsider peeling back the layers of a subject, in this case New Orleans. What I crave as a reader, especially of books that privilege setting , are those written by insiders trying to pull the reader through the outer stratum to the heart of a geographic location.

Consider also Other Rooms, Other Voices by Truman Capote, who although is technically an outsider, sets the novel up as such with the protagonist coming to New Orleans as a thirteen-year-old. The Pulitzer Prize-winning Confederacy of Dunces offers an overtly flawed character who is in so many ways created and destroyed by the city. And finally, I might suggest the best of them all, Earnest J. His topic is not specifically New Orleans, but the whole of Louisiana. In addition to sharing her award-winning music with her fans, McBride also wholeheartedly enjoys experimenting with cooking and sharing the results of her labors.

It is a tradition that she honed growing up with her family in Kansas preparing food with her mother for her daily family meal gatherings. One thing is for sure: these recipes are presented in an easy-to-read and theoretically easy-to-make format, each with a stylish and appetizing accompanying photo. McBride covers almost all of the culinary bases with recipes for breakfast and brunch, cocktails and appetizers, salads, soups and sandwiches, main courses and, finally, side dishes and desserts. She credits her oldest daughter with helping her understand how to utilize new, healthy and fresh ingredients in her cooking while eschewing pre-prepared and heavily processed ingredients.

The recipes also incorporate several ethnic cuisines as well and include plain, good old American fare, but have no fear, most all of the ingredients required can be readily sourced. Dan Blumenthal is part-owner and Head Chef at Bravo! Over the years, Mississippi physicians have tended to shy away from the medical profession for plot-lines, characters, or late-night inspiration, just the opposite of what has happened with the law profession, which has been heralded, dissected and feared with regularity in the creation of prose manuscripts.

That may be because most lay people think they know all there is to know about the law, but find the medical profession threatening at best and unfathomable at worst best suited for television viewing. Possibly there is a universal fear that reading medical dramas might cause cancer. All of which makes the arrival of Dwaine Rieves, a former research pharmaceutical scientist and critical care physician, who made his way from Monroe County, Mississippi, to a writing class at Johns Hopkins University, something of a novelty. Southern politics is NOT a benign hobby.

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Souls come and go, but usually in the quiet pre-dawn of lives quietly lived. Rieves shows with the acceptance of a physician pulling the sheet up over the face of his th patient to die from predictable causes, that soul wrestling can be a frightening business when attempted by amateurs.

I have to confess, I’ve been lying to you.

Rieves is a talented writer who prefers a foundation of rock-solid narration to the breathless complexity of spirited dialog to advance his story. James L. Dickerson is the author of 35 books, totaling about 3. He has never been a household name, but with recording artists such as those on his resume, few have garnered more respect in the music industry. He published a cookbook in that contained a lot of biographical road-story information, but not until his autobiography, Memphis Man , was published in as a paperback and then reissued in in hardcover was the full extent of his career made apparent.

His could well be the definitive history of perhaps the most dynamic musical era in American music history. His career has spanned seven decades. He still records music, discovers new groups and produces records and you can even find Don Nix artifacts in the Stax Music of American Soul Music in Memphis, such as his hat which has its own lore. Nix has always been prolific and he long ago mastered the art of songwriting with songs that are simple, direct and crafted by melding the genres with which he grew up.

He has also always been a canny businessman. Once you dive into his book, you will find him to be first of all a brilliant storyteller. Memphis Man is not just a music autobiography. It is an epic adventure. Name a musical figure of the past 50 years and odds are Nix produced, performed, wrote for and toured with them and if not, he knew them personally. He was close friends with George Harrison and Joe Cocker, and his rocky, successful musical alliance with Leon Russell and Shelter Records is well-documented. And what story about Memphis music would be complete without Elvis stories?

He has plenty of those, too. But over the years, having known many of the people mentioned in the book and having researched the events he talks about I can attest that his stories and adventures are indeed accurate and many happened exactly as he says. No tall tales are needed. This is not just the story of Memphis music. It is also the story of American music. His is a story that needs to be read—and cherished. So take your time and savor every bit of Memphis Man. Warhol was a leading figure in the pop art movement of the s.

He liked to explore the relationship between celebrity pop culture and the all-pervasive advertising that flourished at the time. His work is so intricately detailed that it seemingly bursts with suppressed emotion. Bowls and jars are filled with toys—crayons, whistles, firecrackers, toy buses and the like. When arranged in a glass bowl, these items have the emotional impact of a childhood frozen in time.

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  • For most people, those memories remain locked in the past. Various scenes of the streets of Oxford, Mississippi, on and around the Square, depict time stopped still, especially for those of us who attended the University of Mississippi and walked those streets at night, looking for something, anything really, that could lessen the loneliness of being away from home for the first time.

    Glennray Tutor is a major artist whose works are both unique and familiar, and distinctly Southern, all at the same moment. In a way, he is an accomplished historian. Not only does he capture images from the past, he makes his artistry talk to us in a language that we can understand. What I like most about this book is the way it tells a story, whether depicting cars and trucks, and their not-so-subtle history, or tempting the sense of taste by lining up fruit jars filled with pickled cucumbers, okra, or snap beans, all so realistic that you can almost taste the contents.

    Dickerson is publisher of New Orleans Review of Books. The anthology is a mix of both previously published stories, as well as new stories and the authors range from the famous, such as John Steinbeck and Mark Twain to the less well known at least by this reader. Several themes are present that are shared by many stories in this collection. All the stories, for example, celebrate the relationship between children and adults, their dogs, and the occasional chance cat. Another theme running through the stories is the rescuing of people by their dogs.

    A large number of the stories culminate in the death of the beloved pets. This unfortunately is the usual outcome of any relationship with pets since they have a much shorter life span than humans. In the end, dog owners in these stories believe that life with a dog is better than life without a dog, with the joy and love of being a pet owner outweighing the sadness of parting.

    Dog Stories for the Soul is recommended for all dog lovers and everyone who enjoys a good story. The book is illustrated with a number of color pictures of some of the dogs and some of their people. Sight is one of the first sensory criteria used to make decisions about the foods you choose to eat. Lifelike food photos draw the reader to learn more about the recipes that accompany the picture. You sense his passion for plants and that his desire to do them justice as a recipe developer is sincere.

    There is no doubt that Pakron is an artist and plants are his material.

    ucaliraroqab.cf - Transcripts

    As a registered dietitian, I fully understand that fruits and vegetables provide a wealth of health-promoting nutrients, and satisfying fiber and flavors. There is no argument that helping people, and equipping them with tools to eat more, mainly, or only plants is a good thing. Pakron offers a warm invitation to explore and experiment with out-of-the-norm vegetables, particularly mushrooms, and invites you to step out of your comfort zone both on the plate and in the kitchen.

    You get the sense that a friend is helping you through the process, sharing his best tips from the trenches. Not all the recipes are hardcore. There are several that will ease you into the vegan culinary experience. Being a Mississippian, I found myself thinking of our dietary heritage in a new light, and appreciation.

    Let me paint the picture: okra, sweet potatoes, watermelon, black-eyed peas, collard greens, peanuts, rice, blueberries, blackberries, and pecans.

    Love Narratively? So do we.

    Whether you ever make one of his recipes or not, you will enjoy the stories, both written and visual, in this book. Jackson, Mississippi native Timothy T. There are images of sunsets, sunrises, coastlines, boats, fishermen, and local attractions that have their own particular beauty and show the Coast as a resurgent place. Isbell tells the story of how he came to the Gulf Coast some thirty-odd years ago and began working for the newspapers of the area. He was still in Jackson when Hurricane Camille battered the region in , but he knew of the devastation from news reports of the time.

    No shots of the devastation Katrina wreaked are here—simply beautiful images of the towns that Isbell knows and loves so much. Pictures of the various museums, memorials, and interpretive centers built to document the Katrina memory are sprinkled throughout. Julie Whitehead is a writer who lives in Brandon, Mississippi. Crafting vivid images without relying on tired and well-worn stereotypes, she walks the reader down the streets of her hometown of Waynesboro, Mississippi during her coming of age in the civil rights era, telling a story that is raw, at times shocking, and often painful as truth comes to light.

    The fourth daughter of Lamar and Vivian Clark, she is eleven years younger than her next sibling. Lamar had always wanted a son so it was no surprise when he turned his last child into his sidekick, someone to accompany him as he ran errands around town. He encouraged her to be a tomboy, telling her to never think like a girl, and once he actually reprimanded her for running like a girl. Tena has never been confused or conflicted about who she is. She knew that the girly expectations imposed by Southern society did not reflect her true self. She never felt comfortable in the stiffly starched dresses and long curls that framed her face.

    Her reflection on sexual orientation is written in a direct style, void of emotional turmoil or personal struggle. With money flowing freely, Clark never had any unmet material needs; however, she often turned to Virgie, their African-American help, for emotional support and wisdom. Most whites in her modest town were blind to the harsh realities of the black families living only miles from their own humble dwellings, choosing to believe the blacks were satisfied with the status quo.

    Her comfort and bond with blacks diverted from her family custom of being polite but distant. The irony was blatant since both knew that Vergie touched and cuddled Tena daily, yet Tena was forbidden to touch a little girl because her skin was dark like Virgie. Once she forced her beloved Virgie to accompany her to a segregated restaurant in town with full knowledge that blacks were not welcome. During the encounters she saw the pain and fear she inflicted, but only later fully grasped the impact of her actions.

    I'll talk about them this spring…I promise! There are so many bulbs that I'd like to try to grow but they are such a hassle to dig up and store for the winter. Example: Dahlia bulbs will freeze and rot if left in the ground over the winter. I would imagine caladian bulbs and several other types would be the same way. Wouldn't shredded newspaper serve the same purpose or peat moss? Newspaper always acts as an insulator. If they are stored in a garage where the winter temperatures hover below freezing. I have no place to store them inside the house.

    Betty — I agree — summer bulbs can be a pain because you must dig them up in fall and then find suitable winter quarters for them.

    A tub of cat litter will work. Another option is an insulated ice-chest the kind you might use for a picnic. Fill it with straw, shredded leaves, peat moss, vermiculite or sawdust — any material that is completely dry and fairly dense. Then tuck the bulbs inside, and replace the lid loosely. What a great idea on how to store those summer bulbs.. Those styrofoam chest are reasonably priced too. That opens up some opportunities for me of ideas of planting bulbs in my patio containers.. Loved your post about how you layered your bulbs in that large container. How do you weed your gardens?

    I don't want to use chemicals like Round-Up, but I have a huge area that I could spend the whole growing season weeding by hand or hoe and still not cover it, much less get any other gardening done. I'm sure you've already answered this, so please direct me to that post. Andrea — Most of the weeding here is done by hand. New beds, such as those in my Woodland Garden, are covered first with cardboard and then with mulch. This system smothers the weeds. As for the brick walks in the Rose Garden, I spray undiluted vinegar between cracks in the bricks. Can you describe your troublesome area — or send me a picture of it?

    I might have a solution for you. Oh, my! I would be embarrassed to send you a picture of my weeds! You have helped with the vinegar suggestion. I use newspapers where I want to start new gardens but didn't think to do that between my perennials. Another question….. I've poured gallons and gallons of vinegar on it to no avail. I appreciate you so much! Alternatively, you can spray the lichen with a fungicide. Your garden center will offer an eco-friendly fungicide. Because lichen thrives in shade and compacted soil, you might solve the problem this way: First, prune your perennials back to admit more sun.

    Next, pull up all the lichen by hand. Finally, using a garden claw, gently loosen the soil around your perennials. A million thanks, Kevin. I wish I could reciprocate and help you as much as you have helped me. You wouldn't have a knitting question by any chance…..? Seriously, I am grateful for your knowledge and availability on this site. Hi, Kevin — great postings. Do you have a favorite fertilizer for houseplants as well as in the garden? Pepi — For flowering houseplants, as well as flowering container plants outdoors, I rely on Jack's Classic Its high phosphorous content encourages spectacular bloom.

    Ferns and other woodland-type houseplants, which prefer acidic soil, are fed with Miracid. I no longer scatter fertilizer on the outdoor beds. Instead, I amend the soil each fall with huge amounts of leaf mold. Leaf mold aids in water-retention, and keeps the soil both friable and fertile. Thanks Kevin — I used leaf mold this past fall and can't wait to see how it works. I wasn't able to get all the garden areas finished before the snow fell and fell.

    I need to jump start my Hydrangeas. Any ideas? I wanted to email you in regards in any possible advertising opportunities you may have with your website. Shoot me an email back and let me know if you would be interested at all in supporting this cause or if you want more information on it. I look forward to talking to you soon!

    Hi, Kevin — sorry I dropped out for a couple of days — working on technical issues. Hydrangea most important is Endless Summer — this is the beginning of the 3rd year. First year beautiful blooming, last year nothing so I'm hoping there is something I can do to get more growth and blooms. My other Hydrangeas are very old, grow very tall and have great leaves but don't bloom much.

    Hi, Kevin — I wanted to make the Lavender Cupcakes but the recipe is alluding me. Where should I look? Pepi Noble — 'Endless Summer' has not received good reviews here in endless-winter zone 5. Late spring frosts, which often occur at night and thus go unnoticed kill off all the flower buds. I suspect this is the reason your plant hasn't bloomed well.

    When you bought the plant, it was probably covered with greenhouse-born flower buds, and that's why it bloomed well the first summer. The same might be true for your older hydrangeas. However, if they used to bloom regularly, and then gradually stopped setting buds, perhaps maturing trees are now casting too much shade over the plants. Prune, if you can, the lower branches of your deciduous trees in order to permit more sunlight to reach your cherished older hydrangeas.

    If you want infallible hydrangeas, go with the Pee Gees. Harsh winters, late spring frosts, and hard pruning do not bother them. Their genetic make up tells them to bloom in late summer — period. Honestly, you can't go wrong with Pee Gees. Unfortunately they only bloom in shades of white. Pepi — here's the recipe for swoon-worthy Lavender-Iced Cupcakes.

    Ah…these are unbelievably delicious! Thanks Kevin — we live in a forest of 27 trees, most decades old so pruning is not really an option. However, what is an option now that you've given me this info is to MOVE all the Hydrangeas out of the shade, I got my Endless Summer from a well-known grower who does not use greeenhouse-born bushes so maybe I will talk to him about this. Also I found the Lavender Cupcake recipe. Love your newsletter and Tweets. Click on the link below to check it out!! Why don't my daffodils bloom? I have plenty of leaves and leave the leaves rot after flowering…but very few daffodil flowers this year??

    Spring showed up on the calendar but it forgot to show up in person in our area! We've had maybe 3 or 4 Springlike days since Spring arrived. Rain and more rain! The potting mix in the milk jugs are still wet from the 2 inches we got the first of the week. While some seedlings are outgrowing their milk jugs and needed to be planted out, I did it knowing there was a risk.

    Lot of the sprouts are so spindley, the ones that are HOS seem to be the ones that are doing the best. Yesterday I decided to separate a few milk jugs that were had HOS and they fell apart in my hands when I turned them upside to get them out. I decided since they were so spindly to transplant into 4 in. Have you experienced a really wet wintersowing season? What is the solution? I have limited space to place the wintersowing jugs.

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    • Even the perlite mixed in with the potting mix has turned green. Is that Algae from too much rain? Glad I kept some seeds out and I can attempt to direct sow them again. Until this week when we had two warm Sunny days, the daffs finally are in full bloom and so pretty. Think I will think outside the box this Fall and plant a different variety other then the stand more common daffs.

      Betty — I have indeed experienced a horribly wet winter-sowing season! That's why I punch out so many drainage holes in my milk jugs. Don't worry about the green on the perlite — I have this too. I'm curious why some of your seedlings grew spindly. This has never happened to me. I've bumped my post on Transplanting Winter-Sown Perennials so that it appears on the home page. Besides transplanting info, I describe how, exactly, to get the seedlings out of their milk-jug greenhouse all in one clump. Can anyone tell me a source for the true old fashioned Thanksgiving Cactus.

      Anything I have bought turns out to be Christmas cactus. I want one like mother had. Jerri — nice to meet you. Your local, independent florist can obtain one for you. Click here, and you will see pictures of my Thanksgiving cacti, along with details for growing them. Kevin, Here's the senario: If you have ever rec'd flower seeds in a trade or at a seed swap and they are not marked as to what year the seeds are from, what test do you perform to make certain the seeds are still viable?

      A lady was just here that admired my columbines and I promised to save seeds from them for her. I knew I had some seeds that I'd rec'd at a recent seed swap that I had not got around to planting yet. I looked through my seed pks and found 3 or 4 pk. The ones marked didn't have a username on them. I read about floating them in water first and if they float to the top, they are not good and those that sink will still be viable.

      Then I guess there is the wetpaper towel test that I've read about. Maybe you can comment on this for me and others who are interested. Many thanks! Betty — that is a great idea, and I will do a post on this topic. The paper towel trick is easy enough to do; more complicated is the testing of seeds which require cold stratification.

      These require a couple of freeze-thaw cycles to check germination. Hi Kevin, Can you tell me what the best way to care for tulips once they are past their prime and have lost their petals? We have a zillion of them in some beds that now look very sad. We would like them to bloom again next year but want to now plant some other flowers in those beds. We read that we should dig them up, stems and all, and place them in a trench, lay the bulbs and stems in the trench, cover with a few inches of soil and wait until the green plant part turns brown. Then after that, take the brown plant part off and put the bulbs in a bag and put in a dark, cool place.

      Sounds like a lot of work, but it would free up the beds for other flowers. What's your secret for your tulips? Hi, Lisa — Keep in mind that after a tulip blooms, it relies on its leaves for food. This food acquired through photosynthesis enables the bulb to make an embryo flower for next year's show. Consequently, if you transplant a tulip during this critical period, it will likely go into shock and abort its embryo-making mission. The best plan is to keep the tulips where they are.

      Let the leaves naturally wither and fall off. If you MUST move the tulips and I know how ugly the withering foliage looks , go ahead with the plan you mentioned. But there is a good chance — 50 percent or worse, I'd say — that your tulips will be foliage-only plants next spring. Hi Kevin! My jade plant is growing heavily on one side making the whole plant droop. The 'branches' on that side are so long and heavy they're skimming the windowsill. Is it okay to trim the stalks and replant them inside the same pot?? I've had the plant almost twenty years!!

      Judy — I love jade! Regarding your question, go ahead and cut it back. If there is room in the pot, you can plant the cut pieces there. Did the plant grow heavily on one side because that is where the light was concentrated? If so, be sure to give the pot a quarter-turn at the window each week. Great answer, Kevin! Yes, the plant grew heavily on one side because it was facing the light. I must remember to turn it weekly!

      I've got a tall coreopsis that needed staking last year. Should I try a Chelsea Chop this year instead? So go ahead and cut back your coreopsis, if you wish. Whether it will prolong flowering on this or any other perennial, I haven't a clue. I suspect it would not. On the other hand, cutting back annuals early in the season will dramatically increase their sturdiness, and also the quantity of their blooms. It's not that I'm hoping to prolong the flowering.

      I was just wondering if doing that would stop it from getting too tall and needing staking. I'm just afraid that if I do it now, it will mess up its flowering. Hi Kevin I have a question. Our son was killed in on a corner of two major highways in the UP. We have tried to do a rainbow garden In the shape of rainbow mostly of annuals where this happened.

      We would love this to be spectacular memorial. The first year 10 years ago people donated blue and purple petunia's marigold, red germanium's. We live 15 miles and could not water but it looked ok and people really liked it. This year we redone it with some red monarda, yellow primrose, red petunias, gold and yellow Marigolds and mulched it. It looks ok but we would love it to look spectacular for the fourth of July.. Do you have any ideas of annuals? I just bought some walkers catmint was thinking of planting some there.

      This is almost a mile coming into the town of Munising. BBI — If you are worried about interrupting your coreopsis' flowering, but don't wish to have stems flopping all over the place, try placing a peony ring around the plant. You can use this ring year after year. Otherwise, if your plant has not already started to bud, go ahead and give it a Chelsea Chop.

      It should respond by growing bushier, yet it should still bloom for you. But again — to be safe — avoid doing this if flower buds are already present. Next, I think the rainbow garden is great idea. I have some ideas for colorful annuals. Just tell me which colors you are particularly interested in. Is this to be a red-white-blue 4th of July theme? Thank you Kevin. We have tried to do the rainbow in rainbow colors. The rainbow garden is about 12 feet arch 6 feet in the middle.

      We even have a pot of gold spot. I tried to send a picture but it will not go. I will try and send a picture to your email if you would like to see it…. Susa — Thanks for the picture. I like what you have selected for your rainbow garden, and I imagine the petunias will be spectacular when they have filled out. Here's another idea for a rainbow effect, involving plants which take minimal water. I've listed them in their placement starting with the foreground, and working back:. Edging: White, Sweet Alyssum 2. Begonia semperflorens wax begonia 'Pink Pearl' 3.

      Gomphrena 'Gnome Purple' 4. Celosia 'Amish Cockscomb' red 5. Salvia 'Victoria Blue' as background. Maybe you can consider this for next year's planting? Or, just add the tall blue salvia as background to the planting you currently have. Will add to the group. I love the idea of the white sweet alyssum in front. I think blue salvia was in our local greenhouse My husband built me a small greenhouse so next year I will start the plants. Thanks again and God Bless You….. Hi Kevin, I sent you a question regarding companion plants for astilbe — but I have no idea where to look for your response?!

      I'm not very great at posting….. Here, an astilbe-collection positively shimmers in a bed which includes the following: a variety of ferns New York, Maiden Hair, Royalty, Christmas and Ghost ; brunnera 'Jack Frost,' and red-tinged heuchera. A bed of astilbe and ghost ferns alone would make a dramatic picture. If you wish to add groundcover beneath the plants, choose either lamium or sweet woodruff. Any chance you'll do a comprehensive post on delphiniums? I've never had much success with them and I love them, especially the classic blue ones.

      BBI — Great idea. Like you, I adore blue delphs. Although they loathe the high heat and humidity of the Hudson Valley, I've had success with them in the past. I did not grow any this summer. However, I plan to start a crop next month. When these bloom next spring, I shall indeed take your advice, and do a comprehensive post on them! Thanks, Jeri. Next spring?! I can't wait that long lol. Are they biennials, perennials?

      I have one lonely one blooming right now and I don't know whether to expect it back next year. Definitely going to try and winter sow some of its seeds. It's a little cooler up my way so I'm hoping…. Consequently, if your plant is already 2 years old, better plan on seeding more. Besides seeding, you can also propagate delph from stem cuttings. Select new growth, remove lower leaves and insert the exposed stems into good soil or potting mix. These, if placed in the shade, and the soil is kept moist, will form roots in about 4 weeks.

      My tomato and pepper plants are not growing well, have yellow leaves on the bottom, and the peppers are not flowering — any suggestions? Elva — nice to meet you. From my experience, it is not unusual for the lower leaves of a tomato plant to turn yellow, especially if water is splashing on them.

      A good policy is to mulch the plants with shredded leaves of chopped straw, and then provide water at their roots, via a soaker hose. I wrote about non-flowering peppers recently. Here's how you can coax them to bloom. As for poor growth, this can be the result of several factors. Is it possible your plants were pot-bound when you bought them? Please give me more information. I would love to know where you purchased your white currants: Ribes 'Blanca'.

      I've searched the internet with little success. Thank you! Jen in Vermont — Thanks for writing. Micosta specializes in berries of all kinds. You can reach them a Steven McKay is the owner. I have not seen any insect damage in any of your veggie garden photos. What do you do to manage insect pests?

      Actually, my garden is not free of insects. But since I have stopped all use of pesticides, the garden has become somewhat ecologically balanced. Now beneficial insects are eating harmful ones. Also, I'm a big believer in companion planting for pest-control. Seems to me our watermelons and cantaloupes are not very sweet. Is there something I can do to change that? The Japanese Redneck — Too much water as the plants near maturity can lead to fruit which lacks sweetness.

      Consequently, withhold water just before harvest-time. I need a really good banana cream pie recipe. All I'm finding online are recipes with instant pudding! I don't want that. I want the real deal. Brigid — I love Banana Cream Pie. But I'm with you — instant pudding is horrid. Will see what I can find. I could have sworn I posted this earlier but I guess Mercury retrograde took care of that! Kevin, I am looking for a banana cream pie recipe. All I find online are recipes with pudding and I want the real thing. Stir in milk gradually. Cook over med. Stir at least half of the hot mixture into egg yolks.

      Blend into hot mixture in saucepan. Press plastic wrap over sauce, and let cool to room temperature. Slice 2 large bananas into pre-baked pie shell; pour filling over bananas. Regrigerate until serving time. Top with sliced bananas and whipped cream. Can't find the answer to this anywhere. You're my last hope. I've dug up an old iris bed, divided them and want to replant in the same place. However, the bed was overgrown with violets and anemone, so I used Round Up on the remaining growth. I know…YUK, but was afraid vinegar would change the ph of the soil.

      How long must I wait to replant the rhizomes? Also, how long will the rhizomes be viable just waiting on my garden table? Thank you for being a wonderful resource for gardeners! Annie — Household-type vinegar isn't strong enough to alter the pH of soil. Roundup, unfortunately, remains in the soil for a long, long, time.

      I would not replant your iris in that bed for another year. Otherwise, iris rhizomes are very sturdy. If they were dormant when you dug them meaning the foliage had already withered , you can count on blooms for next spring. Place the rhizomes on your table into a box of peat moss or dry potting soil for now. And then plant them out in October. Again, plant them in a different location. Their roots can easily absorb the Roundup you applied. How do you keep pachysandra contained to a specific area, and not have it continually spreading?

      I enjoy my pachysandra where it is, but I would like to plant flowers in the area beside it. Is there any way to keep the pachysandra from spreading into unwanted areas? Your article and terrific video have convinced me to grow potatoes this season. I am looking for a source of seed potatoes of a good blue variety, but cannot locate one for fall planting in my mild, San Diego climate. They only seem to be offered in the spring. Would you know a source I could contact? Hi, Kathleen! However, you can always buy a few blue potatoes at your local farmers' market. Cut these into pieces as directed in my tutorial, set them in a bright window until they begin to sprout, and then plant them out in your garden.

      Can't imagine why this wouldn't work. Hello Kevin, Thank you so much for all your great advice! I am a frequent visitor to your blog. Can I store the soil over the winter and reuse it next year? None of my plants had diseases or infestations, to my knowledge. If so, how should I store it? It is currently damp, so I'm worried that if I just stick it in a plastic bin in my garage that it will grow mold. Would the container need to be airtight or breathable?

      I've never had mold form on my stored potting mixes. The fertilizer which is usually added to such a mix will be depleted by now, but that's not a problem. Just add more food to the mix next year. You can store the mix either moist or dry. If it's dry, you'll need to rehydrate it next year. And for this you'll need to use near-boiling water. Otherwise dry peat moss is difficult to re-wet. Hi Kevin, I have a question for you. I have this vine that grows between my garage and fence, it seems to have originated in the neighbors yard but the original owners are long gone and no one knows what this vine is.

      It's supposed to be marvelous for both juice and jelly. When I had a garden apartment in Queens, NY, this grape grew in the abandoned yard next door. Apparently it will grow anywhere, and requires no attention whatsoever. The Thelypteris Noveboracensis NewYork fern in the beds next to the house turned brown with the lack of rain and heat in July.

      So, my question is…. I've been trying to find info about this on the web, but failed. Any advice? Anonymous — Good news for you: Your NY ferns have entered dormancy. Go ahead and cut them down. They will return next year. Hello Kevin, An hour or so ago I searched the internet for info on overwintering a Thunbergia Grandiflora. I found a bit of info on your site but became immediately distracted by your lovely posts.

      An hour and a half later, I find myself filled with things to do this fall. Among them, poking holes in milk jugs for winter seed sowing, making some mozz, dividing hostas and reading Ruth Reichl's book, Comfort Me With Apples! I am definitely bookmarking your blog! Now back to my question.

      This summer I bought a Thumbergia Gradiflora at a small, independent greenhouse. Living in Zone 5A, I had never seen this plant. I transplanted it into a larger pot and watched it grow on it's trellis to 5' It stopped blooming after a couple of weeks, perhaps because I did not fertilize it. These terms contain the letter 'n', and this is a clue that their evolution from 'cu' was indirect.

      The missing link is the Latin term 'cuneus', meaning 'wedge'. Euphemistically, 'coin' means 'conceive', and 'coiner' can refer to a man who impregnates a woman, thus the word has a demonstrably sexual, if not explicitly genital, connection. Thus, 'cuneiform', 'coin', and 'cunt' share the same etymological origin: 'cuneus'. The connection between 'cuneus' and 'cunt' is 'cunnus' Latin for 'vagina'; perhaps also related to 'culus', meaning 'anus' , and this connection is most clearly demonstrated by the term 'cunnilingus' 'oral stimulation of the vagina'.

      In this combination of 'cunnus' and 'lingere' 'to lick' , we can see that 'cunnus' is used in direct reference to the vagina, demonstrating that the 'cun' prefix it shares with 'cunt' is more than coincidental. The adjective is 'cunnilingual', and cunnilinus is performed by a cunnilinguist.

      Another link is shown by the 'constrictor cunni', one of the muscles of the vagina. Euphemistic variants of 'cunnilingus' include 'cunnilinctus', 'cumulonimbus', 'cunning lingus', 'Colonel Lingus' t-shirt slogan , 'dunnylingus' incorporating the slang 'dunny', meaning 'toilet', suggesting cunnilingus performed in a bathroom , 'cunnichingus' cunnilingus performed with the chin , 'conulingus' a contraction of 'con you cunnilingus' , and "Canni langi" Michelle Hanson, Viz has created the convoluted euphemisms 'cumulonimbicile' a combination of 'cumulonimbus' and a mis-spelling of 'imbicile', referring to a man who cannot perform cunnilingus , "cumulously nimbate", and "cumulonimbulate" Roger Mellie, There are many terms derived from 'cunnus' that have either literal or metaphorical vaginal or maternal connotations: the Roman goddess Cunina, the pagan goddess Cundrie, the Welsh 'cunnog', 'cuniculus' 'passageway' , 'cununa', and 'cunabula' 'cradle'.

      Also from 'cunnus' is 'cundy', which means 'underground water channel' and is slang for 'vaginal fluid', a vaginal metaphor in the manner of 'cwm'. The Greek 'kusos', 'kusthos', 'konnos' 'tuft of hair' , and 'konnus' perhaps related to the Egyptian 'ka-t' , all emerged in parallel with 'cunnus'. Along with the Hebrew 'kus' and 'keus', they share an initial 'k' in place of the Latin 'c'. In modern Czech, 'kunda' 'vagina' is an invective equivalent to 'cunt', and is also found in the diminutive form 'kundicka' the closest English equivalent being 'cuntkin'.

      In the Volga region of Russia, 'kunka' is a dialect term for 'cunt' related to 'kunat'sja' 'fuck' and 'okunat' 'plunge'. The Norwegian 'kone' 'wife' provides a further variant form, related to the 'ku' and 'cu' feminine prefixes already discussed. Modern Norwegian includes a broad lexicon of related terms, including 'torgkone' 'market-woman' , 'vaskekone' 'washer-woman' , 'gratekone' 'female mourner' , and 'kvinne' 'woman', also spelt 'kvinner' and 'kvinnelig'.

      Like Norway's 'kone' and its variants, there are are many other words with similar meanings, also belonging to Scandinavian languages: 'kunton', the Old Swedish 'kona', 'kundalini' 'feminine energy' , 'khan' 'Eurasian matriarch' , the Hittite 'kun' and 'kusa' 'bride' , the Basque 'kuna' also 'cuna' , the Danish 'kusse', the Old Norse and Old Frisian 'kunta' and 'kunte', the Middle Lower German 'kutte', the Middle Higher German 'kotze' 'prostitute' , and the Icelandic 'kunta' or 'kunt'. The Old Dutch 'kunte' later developed into the more Latinate Middle Dutch 'cunte' and 'conte', and the modern Swedish 'kuntte', though the modern Dutch term is 'kutt'.

      Also spelt 'kut', and extended to 'kutwijf' 'cuntwife' , 'kutt' has been used as the title of the porn magazine Kutt , leading to Lee Carter's 'uncut' pun "live and unKutt" It is interesting that these Dutch examples include the suffixes 'te' and 'tt', as the final 't' of "the most notable of all vulgarisms" has always been "difficult to explain" , according to Eric Partridge, who included 'cunt' in his Dictionary Of Slang And Unconventional English.

      The complex etymological jigsaw of this "most notorious term of all" can now be broadly pieced together: the 'cu' is Proto-Indo-European, the 'n' is Latin, and the 't' is Dutch. The Middle English 'kunte', 'cuntt', 'cunte', 'count', and 'counte' bear the marks of each of these three influences.

      We have seen how the Celtic 'cwm' was influenced by the feminine prefix 'cu', a topographical vagina metaphor comparing the shape and fertility of valleys and vaginas. Other water-related terms also have similarly vaginal connotations, such as 'cundy' 'underground water channel' , which is a hydrographical vaginal metaphor derived from 'cunnus'. Similarly, 'cuniculus', also from 'cunnus', means 'passageway', and was applied to Roman drainage systems.

      Keith Allen and Kate Burridge cite 'cundy' as an early variant of 'conduit', alongside 'cundit', 'kundit', and 'cundut'; they also suggest that 'channel', 'canell', 'canal', and 'kennel' are related to it. The Spanish 'chocha' 'lagoon' is another vaginal metaphor. The Russian 'kunka' describes two hands cupped together carrying water. The vaginal water channel allusion is replicated by the River Kennet in Wiltshire, as Kennet was originally Cunnit: "At Silbury Hill [the river] joins the Swallowhead or true fountain of the Kennet, which the country people call by the old name of Cunnit and it is not a little famous amongst them" William Stukeley, Adjacent to the river is the Roman settlement Cunetio, also spelt Cunetione, Cunetzone, Cunetzione, and Cunetiu though now known as Mildenhall.

      The rivers Kent formerly Kenet and Cynwyd share Kennet's etymology, and, as Michael Dames explains, Kennet's link to 'cunt' is readily apparent: "we may yet rediscover the Kennet as Cunnit, and the Swallowhead as Cunt. The name of that orifice is carried downstream in the name of the river. Cunnit is Cunnt with an extra i. As late as , the peasants of the district had not abandoned the name [ The earliest 'cunt' citation in the Oxford English Dictionary features the word as a component of a London streetname: circa in Southwark, there was a street called Gropecuntelane though variants of the name include Groppecountelane, Gropecontelane, and Gropecunt Lane.

      The street was part of the 'stews', the Southwark red-light district, though its name was not confined only to London. Bristol also had a Gropecountlane, later shortened to Gropelane, subsequently changed to Hallier's Lane, and finally Nelson Street. Martin Wainwright cites a Grope Lane in York, perhaps a sanitised form of Grapcunt Lane or Gropcunt Lane, which was further sanitised to Grape Lane "by staid Victorians who found the original Grope - historically related to prostitution - too blatant" Other 'cunt'-related placenames include Coombe and Kennet, discussed earlier, the evocative Ticklecunt Creek, and the fictitious "Cunt Hill" Robert Coover, Emma Rees added an extra 'n' to Connecticut to create "Charlotte in Connecticu n t" He cites an area once known as Cunta Heale, which Nicholas P Brooks translates as "cunt-hollow".

      Briggs also identifies a curious cluster of Lincolnshire place-names with 'cunt' connections: Cuntebecsic, Hardecunt, Cuntewellewang, Cuntesik, Cuntland, and Scamcunt Grene. He also cites Hungery Cunt, which appears on a military map of Scotland in Cleish, though the name is presumably a mis-spelling of Hungeremout. Graeme Donald cites another form of 'cunt' used as a proper noun, this time in medieval surnames, two of which predate the OED 's earliest citation: "Early records mention such female names as Gunoka Cuntles , Bele Wydecunthe and presumably promiscuous male sporting names such as Godwin Clawecunte , John Fillecunt and Robert Clevecunt " Explaining that "Any part of the body which was unusual [or] remarkable was likely to provide a convenient nickname or surname for its owner" , James McDonald cites the further example of Simon Sitbithecunte , again predating the OED.

      Keith Briggs cites further 'cunt' names: Cruskunt, Twychecunt, and Bluthercuntesaker. Russell Ash provides more recent examples, in a book chapter titled The C-word : "despite its super-taboo status, 'cunt' and its variants crop up as both a first name and surname in Britain". Carolee Schneemann wrote a letter to Friends magazine using the pseudonym "Cuntalee Snowball" , criticising its Cunt Of The Week column: "A couple signal to a cab. It does not stop for them.

      The man screams after the cab, "You cunt! A player drops a ball. The men yell, "Cunt! Stupid cunt! Does it stand for what they hate? In the first episode of the comedy series In Time With Alan Partridge , the eponymous character mistakenly refers to another character as "Alice Clunt", the joke being that her 'real' name is Alice Fluck Neil Gibbons and Rob Gibbons, Do not call her by the obvious dirty nickname" Matthew Schofield, The surname Kuntz has a tantalising phonetic similarity to 'Cunts', and is especially notable in the case of WD Kuntz, whose 'cunt' connection is compounded by his position as a gynaecologist.

      We all feel like that [ Tom Conti has received the same treatment: Gareth McLean wrote that "Conti should probably enter the vernacular as a term of abuse" , owing to its similarity to 'cunt'. The surname Kant is commonly confused with 'cunt', as Mark Lawson discovered to his cost on a live television programme: "My error was not to have known that the Philosopher Immanuel Kant's surname is habitually pronounced by academics to rhyme with "punt"" Furthermore, the name of a character in the film I'll Never Forget What's 'is Name , Quint, has been interpreted as a reference to 'cunt'.

      Terence Meaden suggests that legal suppression of 'cunt' constituted "a series of vicious witch hunts encouraged by an evil establishment wishing to suppress what amounted to apparent signs of Goddess beliefs" , and, indeed, there was a Japanese goddess Cunda, a Korean Goddess Quani the Tasmanian 'quani' means 'woman' , a Phoenician priestess Qudshu, a Sumerian priestess Quadasha, and, in India, a goddess known variously as Cunti-Devi, Cunti, Kun, Cunda, Kunda, Kundah, and Kunti, worshipped by the Kundas or Kuntahs.

      These names all indicate that 'cunt' and its ancient equivalents were used as titles of respect rather than as insults as does the Egyptian term, 'quefen-t', used by Ptah-Hotep when addressing a goddess. My own surname, Hunt, also has associations with 'cunt', as experienced by a character called Mike Hunt in a Leslie Thomas novel: "And if I 'ear any of you giving me nicknames - like My Cunt, Mike 'Unt, get it? The Mike Hunt pun can be traced back as early as the 19th century: "The dance was followed up by an out-and-out song by Mike Hunt, whose name was called out in a way that must not be mentioned to ears polite" FLG, The C-word.

      The hardest word of them all" Mike Hunt is also the name of an American publishing house. The phrase is found in the Australian drinking toast Mich Hunt's Health That's all they are, really. A bunch of Colin Hunts" Charlie Catchpole, Smut has a comic strip called Kevin Hunt which puns on 'cunt'.

      Stupid Hunts , a pun on 'stupid cunts', was used as a headline by Total Film magazine in FCUK and Cnut are both tabooed words with their respective middle letters reversed, the difference being that FCUK was a deliberate reference to 'fuck' whereas Cnut was an accidental reference to 'cunt'.

      This accidental reference may explain why Canute has now replaced Cnut, in an attempt to Anglicise and elongate the word and thus disguise its similarity to 'cunt'. French Connection initially insisted that the similarity between FCUK and 'fuck' was merely coincidental, though they soon dropped their false modesty by pressing charges against the rival Cnut Attitude clothing brand. His name now prompts predictable double-entendres, such as this from Simon Carr: "John Prescott made King Canute gestures with his hands.

      Or, more accurately, King Cnut gestures I'm glad I'm not dyslexic " Private Eye punned on the name with its headline Silly Cnut in A Daily Star feature on the programme somewhat missed the point with the headline You Cnut Be Serious , using Cnut as a pun on 'cannot'.

      The euphemistic Spoonerism 'cunning stunts' 'stunning cunts' relies not on rhyme but on a reversal of the initial letters, a trick later imitated by Kenny Everett's "dangerously named" Mark Lewisohn, comedy character Cupid Stunt, a Spoonerism of 'Stupid Cunt'. Furthermore, 'Cunning Stunts' is also the name of an advertising agency and a female theatre group.

      Richard Christopher cites two further 'cunt' Spoonerisms both of which are rather sexist : "What's the difference between a magician and a chorus line? In a final Spoonerism, Courtney Gibson recalls a conversation between the Mayor of Newcastle and the Queen Mother: the Mayor attempted to point out the 'punts and canoes' on the river, though this became "the colourful c[u]nts and panoes cruising the river", to which the Queen Mother replied: "what exactly is a panoe?

      William Shakespeare uses it in All's Well That Ends Well [a] : "From below your duke to beneath your constable, it will fit any question", and, more recently, 'thingstable' has become a recognised euphemism for 'constable', acknowledging the 'cunt' link. The bawdy comedy film Carry On Constable is a pun on the c-word, with its phrase "silly constable" further emphasising the joke Gerald Thomas, Ned Ward has reversed the syllables of 'constable' to create "stablecunt" , and 'constable' has also been rendered as 'cunt stubble' and 'cony-fumble'.

      Another euphemism for 'cunt' is 'the big C': "the big "C". No, I'm not talking Cancer. I'm talking Cunt" Anthony Petkovich, The phrase was used as the headline for an article about 'cunt' by Joan Smith The Big C , , however it is also the name of a shopping centre and garage in Thailand. Similar terms are 'red c' 'red cunt', a pun on 'Red Sea' and 'open C' 'open cunt'. Other words termed 'big C' include 'cancer' and 'cocaine', and 'cirrhosis'. Even 'C' in isolation has also been used as a substitute for 'cunt', as in "the Cs of Manchester United" Paul Wheeler, - a phrase which is seemingly innocuous yet also readily understood as an insult.

      A handy two-birds-with-one-stone euphemism for both 'fuck' and 'cunt' is the phrase 'effing and ceeing' thus, 'Woking FC' officially stands for 'Woking Football Club' though has also been extended to 'Woking Fucking Cunts'. Eva Mendes created the extraordinary "motherfuckingcuntwhorebitch" Chris Hewitt, , and Douglas Coupland created the shorter portmanteu word "Fuckshitpisscunt" No prizes for guessing what the first draft of that joke was!

      It has also been intentionally mis-spelt as "cund" Viz , Ruth Wajnryb notes the print media's coy treatment of the word: "CUNT has retained its shock-and-horror capacity. A good test of this is how a word is treated in the media. Most print media still baulk at printing CUNT, resorting to the rather quaint convention of asterisk substitution" Using other characters, especially asterisks, to replace letters often vowels , serves to accentuate a word's obscenity, drawing attention to its unprintability.

      Though the word 'cunt' is printed by some British newspapers, it never appears in a large font size, and is therefore never used in headlines. American newspapers are much more cautious about references to swear words in general, and 'cunt' in particular practically the only exception being The Village Voice , which used the headline Cunt Candy Factory for an article by Tristan Taormino about "disembodied replicas of porn stars' famous bits [moulded into] plaster cunts" in As we shall see later, not only is 'cunt' a taboo in America, but discussion of this taboo is also a taboo in itself.

      Thus, while a few British newspapers print 'cunt' in full, and all British newspapers gleefully use the phrase 'the c-word' to describe any word starting with that letter, American newspapers often refuse even to print 'the c-word', let alone printing 'cunt' itself. Bertagnoli's article identified a phenomenon she termed "linguistic bleaching", suggesting that 'cunt' is changing its linguistic value through cultural repetition. She argues that, with the word's creeping presence on cable television and in general conversation, it is becoming an increasingly neutral term in casual speech.

      However, her article, and its by British standards, quite mild headline, were considered too strong by the Chicago Tribune editors, who decided at the last minute to remove it while the newspaper was actually being distributed. The article had already been printed, so the section in which it appeared was physically removed from the newspaper, though some early copies could not be recalled and the newspaper's censorship of itself was viewed with both scorn and humour by American media commentators.

      However, none of the commentators who criticised the Tribune actually used the word 'cunt' themselves. In a radio report about the scandal, for example, Bob Garfield referred to "a word beginning with 'c' and rhyming with 'shunt' [ Lisa Bertagnoli herself, the author of the suppressed article, sees the word as "something vile and hurtful, to be reclaimed", and maintains that women of her generation are not offended by the word: "I say that to my friends; I refer to a part of my body by that word. No big deal". By contrast, she admits that the typical response from older women is somewhat less accepting: "oh, my God.

      Never use that word. Vile, repulsive. I would faint if somebody said it to me". An affectionately disguised variant of 'cunt' is 'cunny', whose variants include 'cunnie', 'cunni', 'cunnyng', 'cunicle', 'conny', 'coney', 'conney', 'conie', and 'cunnikin'. Bunny Rogers wrote a poetry collection titled Cunny Poem in William Shakespeare hinted at this second meaning in Love's Labour's Lost , juxtaposing 'incony' with 'prick' 'penis' : "Let the mark have a prick in't [ Related are 'conyger' meaning 'warren' and also spelt 'conynger', from the Middle English 'conygere' , the Anglo-Latin 'coningera' and 'conigera', and the Latin 'cunicularium'.

      The word also appears in Old French, as 'conniniere', 'coniniere', 'coniliere', and 'connilliere'. Perhaps in an effort to minimise the scurrilous impact of 'cunny', 'cony' was phased out of common usage and the meaning of 'rabbit' was extended to animals both young and old. Spanish and French provide strikingly similar examples: the French 'connil' 'rabbit' was phased out due to its proximity to 'con' 'cunt' , and replaced with the alternative 'lapin'.

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      The Spanish 'conejo' means both 'rabbit' and 'cunt', and the similar Spanish term 'conejita' 'bunny girl' provides another link between the two elements. The similarity of 'cony' to 'cunny' is echoed by the relationship between 'count' and 'cunt': "It is a likely speculation that the Norman French title 'Count' was abandoned in England in favour of the Germanic 'Earl' [ Indeed, the title 'count' is rendered in Gaelic as 'cunta'.

      The Gaelic 'cunta', with an acute accent over the 'u', means 'assistant. Keith Briggs cites place-name suffixes such as Le Cunte derived from 'count'. As early as a direct and bawdy comparison between 'Earl' and 'Count' was made by Stephen Valenger:. The phonetic similarity of 'Count' to 'cunt' is so striking that accidental obscenities abound: Gordon Williams notes that, "[during] a Restoration performance of Romeo and Juliet [an actress] enter'd in a Hurry, Crying, O my Dear Count! She Inadvertently left out, O, in the pronuntiation of the Word Count [ For our losers: the chance to retype that sentence without the spelling mistake" Paul Wheeler, The programme has also used "bunch of cundurangos" as a pun on 'bunch of cunts'; John FD Northover, Linacre Lane cites 'Count Of Monte Cristo' as a Scouse insult, adding dryly: "The first word is often intentionally mispronounced" In the s, a sign in a Japanese railway station advertised 'Discunt Tickets', a misprint of 'Discount Tickets'; similarly, the menu for London restaurant Bengal City misprinted 'Discount' as 'Discocunt'.

      Bangkok University's School of Accounting's logo replaces the 'o' of 'Accounting' with a graphic representing a ship, rendering it as 'Acc unting'. Like 'count', 'countdown' also has comic potential if its 'o' is removed, as we shall see later. This last example, 'Charlie Hunt', is especially significant, as its abbreviated form 'Charlie' has entered the common vernacular as merely a term of mild reproach.

      The expression 'proper Charlie', for example, is used frequently without causing offence, as its connection to 'cunt' has been forgotten. Although 'Charlie Hunt' is the most often cited origin of the abbreviation 'Charlie', another possible source is 'Charlie Ronce', which is rhyming slang for 'ponce'.

      It has been abbreviated to 'grumble', though this abbreviation is frequently a reference to pornography, so-called because heterosexual porn includes images of vaginas 'grumble and grunts'. In this pornographic sense, 'grumble' has been extended to form 'grumbled' 'caught in the act of masturbation', a pun on 'rumbled' , 'grumblehound' 'constant seeker of porn' , 'grummer' 'porn magazines' , 'jumble grumble' and 'grumble sale' 'cheap pornography' , 'grumbleweed' 'weak from excessive masturbation' , 'grumbelows' 'sex shop' , 'grumbler' 'pornography vendor' , and 'grumbilical chord' 'connecting lead for porn TV channels', a pun on 'umbilical chord'.

      It is from this that the mild insult 'berk' also 'birk', 'burk', and the Australian 'burke' is abbreviated, thus, as Jonathon Green explains, "when [people] say 'You're a right berk', what they're actually saying is 'You're a right cunt', which is much more obscene" Kerry Richardson, In this sense, 'berk' is similar to 'Charlie', as both are common, mild insults whose origins as rhyming slang for 'cunt' have been forgotten. In a spoof article supposedly written by Boris Johnson, Private Eye defined "Berkely Hunt" a mis-spelling of either 'Berkeley Hunt' or 'Berkley Hunt' as "Darius Guppy", in a reference to Johnson's association with Guppy tarnishing his public image; the magazine also combined 'Berkeley Hunt' and 'cunning stunts' to create the headline Berkeley Stunts ; later that year, it punned on the name Anton du Beke with "Anton Du Berk" ; and it also punned on Sally Bercow's surname: "don't make your husband look like a berc!

      Other Cockney rhyming slang 'cunt' euphemisms are 'all quiet' from All Quiet On The Western Front ; extended to 'all quiet on the breast an' cunt' , 'eyes front', 'Grannie Grunt', 'groan and grunt', 'gasp and grunt', 'growl and grunt', 'sharp and blunt', and 'National Front'. The Cockney pronunciation of 'cunt' was evocatively captured by Clark Collis "You cahnt! The Yorkshire equivalent is "coont" Peter Silverton, , and in Jamaican patois it is "cohnnnt" Marlon James, In backslang, 'cunt' is 'tenuc' and 'teenuc' the extra letters being added to facilitate pronunciation , and 'cunt' in pig Latin is 'untcay'.

      A word with so many hard consonants in it in short a short time: un, tuh, cuh". A feminist pressure-group called 'Cunst', an anagram of 'cunts' and a pun on 'kunst' German for 'art' campaigned in against male domination of the Turner Prize. In a Top Gear episode Phil Churchward, , Jeremy Clarkson noted that there were "a lot of anagrams going on here" on various car registration plates, followed by a shot of his own plate, CTU N.

      The euphemism 'see you next Tuesday' utilises each letter of 'cunt' individually, with 'see you' sounding like 'c u', and 'n t' being the respective initial letters of 'next' and 'Tuesday'. Time Out magazine created posters with the slogan 'See you next Tuesday' in See You Next Tuesday is also the title of a play adapted from the film Le Diner De Cons , thus both the play and the film have 'cunt'-related titles. Similar to 'see you next Tuesday' is "see you in Toledo" Brooke Gladstone, , though in this case the letter 'n' is provided by a contraction of 'in'.

      This spoof organisation placed a classified advertisement in the Kuwait Times : "Teacher? New to Kuwait? Then you need the Kuwait Union for New Teachers. They have also printed the text onto a t-shirt. Similarly, embedded within an article by Sally Vincent is the line "Point A moved to point B to point C until" , which is arguably an intentional reference.

      There is no ambiguity whatsoever surrounding "-cunthorpe", a deliberate truncation of the Humberside town Scunthorpe on the back cover of a book by Stephen Fry and Hugh Laurie Likewise, when a knight in Thomas Heywood's Wisewomen Of Hogsdon declares, in Latin, "Nobis ut carmine dicunt", he is described as "a beastly man" to highlight the embedded obscenity.

      Mrs Roberts didn't like him, but that's 'cos she's a Contaminated water can really make you sick"; Trey Parker, and 'applicant' Dominic Brigstocke, :. As John Hamilton explains in an letter quoted by Linda Mugglestone , 'cunt' has "the same syllable as a contraction of Contra". Oz made a similar pun on 'conjugal': "Oh, a cuntjugal" Nick Gomez, Matthew Parris once called 'cunt' "a word beginning with 'c', which I couldn't possibly repeat" Rod Liddle, , and in keeping with this is the commonest 'cunt' euphemism: 'the c-word' not to be confused with 'crossword', which is sometimes abbreviated to 'c-word'.

      Simon Carr reports that his children confuse 'the c-word' with "the K-word" He also quotes their confusion over 'cunt' itself: "Mummy, clint! That's a rude word, isn't it? Ruth Wajnryb writes "the 'SEE'-word" , to distinguish it from the hard 'c' sound of 'cunt'. If 'cunt' can be a 'c-word', can 'cock' be one, too? A surprisingly large number of these other words beginning with 'c' have also occasionally been called 'the c-word', usually for comic effect. The following is a representative selection.

      No surprise, then, that he is a fan of the c-word. In fact, not only is Musk a regular player of the computer game known as Civilization , which is all about husbanding resources to build an epic human community, but that word peppers his public utterances" BBC World Service, ; "Catholicism: the c-word. Not the c-word, a c-word" Ricky Gervais and Stephen Merchant, ; "They definitely had the c-word: they had chemistry" Katy Takatsuki, ; "two other C-words: Conscience and Cyclothymia" Alexandra Mullen, ; "[Christopher] Nolan's script, co-authored with his brother Jonathan, never deigns to use the c-word: Catwoman" Robbie Collin, ; "non-carcinogenic [ Uh oh, the other dreaded c-word.

      Cut" The Sun , ; "the c-word: 'cuts'" Victoria Derbyshire [BBC Radio 5 Live], ; "another c-word: 'contextualise'" Dymphna Flynn, [a] ; "the c-word: 'compliance'" Dymphna Flynn, [b] ; "Clunge a slang word for female genitalia is the new C-word" Liz Hoggard, ; "try to avoid mentioning the crowd [because] they hate the C-word here" Charlie Wyett, ; "he was anxious to avoid the c-word: 'corporate'" Annie Dunkinson, ; "In went the c-word - c as in crisis" Catherine Donegan, ; Yesterday In Parliament quoted David Cameron saying "Why's he so chicken when it comes to the Greens?

      These are not conservatories" Jon Stock, ; "Could you make it more celebratory? Could you compromise? Hey, we're all guys here, I'll say it: cuckoo-head" Pam Cooke, ; 'championship': "Stevie Craigan is running scared of an ear-bashing from John Lambie for mentioning the 'C' word" Andy Devlin, ; 'crash': "We don't mention the C-word" Tim Ross and David Gordois, ; "uttering the C word - as in "choke"" George Kimball, ; "building momentum off three c-words: crowds showing up in bigger numbers than ever before, more cash in the bank than any other GOP candidate, and a confidence in the campaign strategy of turning out conservatives in Iowa and the South" NBC Nightly News , ; "Is Caitlyn the new c-word?

      Paul Casey, ; "isn't that Italian "champagne"? The "C" word" Fiona Phillips, ; 'comradely': "an exceedingly rare [Tony] Blair use of the c-word" Andrew Rawnsley and Gaby Hinsliff, ; "'There are good comrades who have fallen,' he said, an exceptional use of the c-word from [Tony Blair]" Andrew Rawnsley, ; "conservation [ Mr Clinton had charisma" Patrick Barkham, ; 'Clinton': "I have that uneasy feeling that the C word has echoed behind me in the corridors of corporate America" Kathleen Deveny, ; 'coup': "In his only public statement since Mr. Morsi's ouster, Mr. Carter" Mark Hosenball, ; "I would include Emanuelle And The Last Cannibals other than just, you know, because the title uses the c-word" Calum Waddell, ; "I don't want to use the 'C' word, chokers, so I am not going to" Commentatorballs , ; "[He] looked like someone who didn't even know what the C-word might be.

      The revue show The C Word revolved around three c-words: 'comedy', 'clits', and 'cake'. Mark Mason's novel The C Words discusses 'commitment', 'coupledom', and 'children'. Grace Chin wrote a play about commitment titled The C-Word in There was even a c-word reference in a TV commercial for Phileas Fogg crisps :. After it was reported that Donald Trump called a woman a word beginning with 'c' and ending with 't', Stephen Colbert misunderstood for comic effect: "He called her a cat?!

      The most frequent word, other than 'cunt', to be termed 'the c-word', is 'cancer': "The C-words Cancer and Comedy" Allen Klein, and "students talk about the Big C word. They don't mean Cancer. They mean Commitment" John Allen Lee, A cancer-awareness comedy event titled The 'C' Word was held in Toronto in Newspaper headlines often use the phrase 'the c-word' to pun on other contentious terms beginning with that letter: "the phrase 'the c-word' is sometimes deliberately used to mean something else, while exploiting the intertextuality of the original meaning" Ruth Wajnryb, ; for example The Guardian 's headline Kick-Ass 2 Star Chloe Moretz On Carrie, Controversy And Other C-Words Andrea Hubert, , in which Moretz compared the c-word in America and the UK: "cunt is a funny word.

      It's a strong word, sure, but more so in America. In England it's just like any other curse word". The most common example of this is 'Christmas', which, like 'cancer', can be seen as an alternative 'c-word'. The headline Don't Mention The C-Word , for example, is about the removal of the word 'Christmas' from secular greetings cards.

      In the article, Richard Littlejohn asks, rhetorically: "Who, exactly, is offended by the C-word? He has fun inventing phrases such as "Father C-word", "C-word Eve", and "C-word Day", all attempts to highlight the absurdity of banning the word 'Christmas'. Less festively, he also bemoans the culture of liberalism, 'political correctness', and ' Guardian istas' in other words, his usual targets , asking: "How on earth do you describe these New Scrooges? Difficult, I know. But try the other C-word".

      As if that wasn't enough, Littlejohn went on to essentially repeat himself two Christmases later, in another article also headlined Don't Mention The C Word "the dreaded C Word [